Why would I allow myself to love? For me love is both a selfish indulgence and an invitation to despair. It is destructive to the object of my affections, for if they return my love they make themselves a part of a relationship that will can only leave them childless and in their grave. One […]

Posted on September 25th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Immortality, Love, Regrets, The Past | 2 Comments »

Awakening. Imagine you have slept with your arm under your body, squeezing off the circulation so that the limb is completely insensate. You roll off your arm and it flops free- you can feel the circulation returning, fresh blood rushing in as your arm returns to life in a tingling rush, sometimes quite painfully, stinging […]

Posted on September 22nd, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Immortality, Love, The Past | 7 Comments »

We were riding together. It was the spring of our second year and the house was rebuilt, the children were as settled and adjusted as anyone could expect and we finally had some time to devote to ourselves. No genteel traveling for us, instead we packed up what we needed and struck out on our […]

Posted on September 19th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Immortality, Love, The Past | Comments Off on The Truth

“I have been wondering, is there anything you cannot do?” I lifted my eyes from my book and smiled at my husband, “Whatever are you talking about?” “Mrs. Trembley. A woman who could not bring herself to offer a civil hello to the new Pastor for three years invites you to join her for Sunday […]

Posted on September 19th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Love, The Past | Comments Off on Interlude

How do you tell somebody you love that you are not what you seem to be? How do you tell anyone that you are immortal? I met Jeremy in California in 1829. We journeyed together across what was then northern Mexico, pretending to be an Irish couple to avoid problems with what few local authorities […]

Posted on September 18th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Immortality, Love, The Past | Comments Off on Revelation

I made a brief visit to Boston where a certain Safe Deposit Box contains certain things of little value to anyone but myself. From that box I retrieved a Diary, and a letter. Both are quite old, but the script on the diary is still familiar. I can remember the first line without looking: “I […]

Posted on September 12th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Friends Lost, Immortality, The Past | 3 Comments »

September 11, 2001 I tend towards the emotionless when it comes to world-changing events. I was watching on television the morning of September 11, 2001, at a fitness center of all things. The news had cut to the story of a plane colliding with one of the towers while I was listening to some very […]

Posted on September 11th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Regrets, The Past, The Present | Comments Off on September 11, 2001

Awareness is an odd thing. One is tempted at all times to draw a fine, bright line between the time when there was no awareness, and the time where there was. Unfortunately, awareness is seldom so neatly defined. Even in the most extreme cases, there is a disconnect between when reality reveals itself and the […]

Posted on September 1st, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Immortality, The Past | 7 Comments »

I am flattered when anyone takes the time to speculate rationally regarding the nature of my existence, particularly when one goes to the lengths The Yeti obviously did in his missive to me. That having been said, I hope he does not take what I have to say about it as dismissive or disrespectful. I […]

Posted on August 25th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Immortality, Philosophy, The Past | 3 Comments »

The Yeti writes, offering the following theories and speculations. The links are my own, just to provide some background. I have comments to make; however, I will offer them seperately. Man’s ancestor apes are now placed at a staggering 25 million years ago. Hominids appeared about 14 million years ago. 3 million years created the […]

Posted on August 24th, 2003 by Zsallia
Filed under: Immortality, Philosophy, The Past | 4 Comments »